I am going to give you a scenario. Lets say you are madly in love with a man. You’ve been together for 10 plus years and have two children together. Then one day, you meet an associate of his. Before you know it, you find out that not only is this his associate, she is actually his other girlfriend. Heartbroken and humiliated, you try to pick up the pieces and figure out what is next for your family. After some time, you rationalize that this is just a phase and that you are the one he truly wants to be with. After all, you did not put in all this time and energy for nothing! But before you can even try to forgive him, you find out that not only is this “associate” his girlfriend, she is his wife. Messy right? Well, what if I told you this scenario was a true story? In fact, it is the love triangle involving Peter Gunz, his wife Amina, and his ex-girlfriend Tara as it plays out on VH1’s Love and Hip-hop: New York.
Some of you may be wondering, what exactly is a love triangle? When I speak in terms of a love triangle, I am referring to three (or more) people that are in a situation that involves two of the participants actually sharing someone. Often times, the two (in this case Amina and Tara) put up a major front victimizing themselves and claiming they had no idea about the other person. I personally believe that is a load of BS. I don’t think anyone deliberately involved in a love triangle can victimize themselves. Watching the show, I often wonder why people willingly put themselves through all the drama, confusion, and heartbreak that being in a love triangle can entail. I find it hard to sympathize because people have control over their own involvement in the situation. This is very different than someone who has no idea they are getting cheated on (those people I sympathize with). Whether Tara or Amina like to admit it, they willingly got involved in a love triangle and allowed it to play out on TV. And rather than hold Peter accountable for his actions, both women insist on tearing each other down and competing with one another.
Being in a love triangle is an emotional rollercoaster that no one seems to want to get off. Rather than fight it, some have simply accepted the fact that they will need to share their partner with someone else. In some situations, a love triangle simply works, but it doesn’t in most. Most of the time, people stay in situations longer than they should for fear of “missing out” or “losing” their partner to someone else. But newsflash, if you have to compete with others for the sake of your relationship, you are in deep trouble. You are doing yourself an injustice, and you must do better! After all of the lying, embarrassment and betrayal, is happily ever after even possible? And if it is not, then what’s the point in sticking around and fighting for the relationship?
Stay tuned for more blog post from one of our favorite Spot girls, Mo.
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